Hey there,
I LOVE summer. I love sitting outside, in the shade, maybe getting sweaty, lazily doing nothing. The heat feeds the fire-y bits of my constitution and swells my inner sunshine. I love my summer uniform: short shorts, crop top, sandals, and sunglasses.
I love summer activities: camping, going to the beach, stand-up paddle boarding, taking long walks to the ice cream shop and slurping the sweet cream all the way home.
Some of the best people I know celebrate their birthdays in these warm months. And maybe it’s just conditioning from the years of life being oriented around the school year, but summer always feels a bit freer.
This Spring, when it finally got warm enough to start wearing shorts, I felt SO GOOD. For a few weeks, I felt like I was walking on clouds, everything felt easy. I was doing everything I needed and most of the things I wanted. I was exercising and eating my veggies. I was allowing space for feelings and stress about the current political environment, and none of it was getting me down. I reduced the frequency of my therapy.
Now to be fair, it’s not just the weather that had me feeling great. Around that same time, a few changes in my business had really settled in. I was looking forward to an exciting trip. And working on the podcast was giving me a lot of energy.
Not much about my life has changed since then, but this week, I feel blah. Low motivation. I have to talk myself into going to work. Waking up after a full night’s sleep still feeling tired. Overwhelmed by the news. I cried about I-couldn’t-tell-you-what during my acupuncture appointment yesterday.
Since regular acupuncture helps me keep track, I know dips like these following periods where I feel great are normal for me. And they’re more acute during the summer. Because of the aforementioned love of the season, the highs are higher, and the lows are lower.
I’m not sure how long this funk will last. I wish it wouldn’t happen at all.
In the past, I’ve chased the highs harder and brute-forced my feelings into being “happy” all the time.
Now I know that nothing lasts forever, and I don’t shame myself for the dips.
They’re annoying nonetheless.
So I’m writing you about it, and hoping that the yuck clears out soon. I’ll keep you posted.
A smol publishing update
I’ve been DIY renovating my basement for a long time, and it’s been going slowly. I have a deadline and some good momentum right now, so I need to devote more energy to that. To make that space, I’m giving myself permission to ease up on writing here over the summer.
I have a few inbox whimsy letters planned, so those will continue mostly regularly, and might even include a few basement renovation sneak peeks.
I will write these longer letters if I have capacity, but no promises.
The podcast will still come out every other Sunday through Season One, and I am SO EXCITED for you to hear the stories that are coming up.
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Reflection Questions:
What do you notice about your seasonal shifts?
How do you make sense of it when your mood shifts?
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Tarot Spread:
I’m sharing one of my favorite I-don’t-know-exactly-what-I-need-or-what-to-ask-but-I-still-want-some-insight spreads, since it might be a minute before I send another. Here she is!
To use this Spread:
Shuffle your cards, thinking about the question or guidance you’re hoping for. Lay cards out, left to right, setting the intention for each card as you lay it. Flip your cards over, one by one, in the same order you laid them down. Notice what about the card stands out to first and most, rather than relying on what you’ve learned about the cards. Reflect on the guidance you’ve received.